Sunday, August 25, 2013

Feeling lonely

Another heart mom post recently that she has felt as though everyone who was once close to her has left her high and dry because of her son's Heart. It sadly hit too close to home. Family has been awesome. My parents come up here quit often and have not "forgotten" about us. However, we live 1500 miles from our families so the friends we make in the military have come to compensate for the times our family isn't here, which is 90% of the time. Slowly our friends have seemed to drop away.  I know a lot don't know how to act. I have had numerous people say they are scared. It hurts because we no longer get invites to friends we were once close with or phone calls updating us on the recent good news they have or any news for that matter. Instead we find out via facebook. I know it goes both ways and with Christian's appointments I get busy, but I do text back. After hanging with a baby all day I do like adult interaction :) 

People don't know what to say or how to act so they just ignore us. Cut us out of their lives because of our reality we live with daily. I just pray that for the ones that have cut us out, simply because you do not have to be reminded of what we go through daily, that you never have to go through a struggle like ours without support. Yes, our story is a hard one to swallow. It is a reality that EVERY PARENT has the chance of living. Your perfectly healthy child could have been born with HLHS! Instead of being scared and/or close minded, I encourage you to research it. It isn't the plague and although we do have to be extra careful with Christian, we still get out and do stuff. Sometimes we won't because he is sick or someone else was sick recently and we don't want him catching it. 

Just because we went through hell and back doesn't mean we wouldn't be there for you either. Even if it is to be an ear to listen to. Truly is sad we have lost friends over our son having a defect, but we have gained some pretty awesome ones too. I love my new heart mama friends that are able to relate and talk with. Anyway that was my rant. Just be careful when you abandon friends that are going through trials, because what goes around.....
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1 comment:

  1. PamAugust 25, 2013 at 9:01 PM

    I am so sorry this has happened to you. As someone who has several chronic illnesses, I can relate. The same thing happens to me and others who struggle with sickness. I think healthy people get tired of being around sick people and/or sick kids. It's like they just want you to get well already. And maybe they are afraid it will happen to them and they can't handle it, so they'd rather be out of sight, out of mind.
    It is disappointing, especially for you when you are so far away from your family.

    I can say that my illnesses have made me super sensitive to others in the same boat.And that's the gift that came out of all the pain. And you too can be that friend, that hope, for some other woman going thru a severe illness with their child. And I know you already are as I see your postings for other sick kids.

    So, just know that while others may let you down, the ones you are supporting is all that matters!! That is the great gift that God has given you in Christian's illness. Both you and Christian are such an inspiration to so many!!!

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